BenFranklinsDick@lemmy.worldtoLemmy Shitpost@lemmy.world•Consume shitpost and get excited for next shitposts
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2 months agoI would shake Rich Evan’s dick to get the last of his pee out if he asked me.
I would shake Rich Evan’s dick to get the last of his pee out if he asked me.
I recently asked if she could pop a zit I couldn’t reach on my back, and she said she “preferred not to, as it’s a bit gross”.
Should I break up with her?
My ex-girlfriend used to break oatmeal cookies over my bare chest and would vacuum it up with a Bissell handheld vacuum. She’d call me her oatmeal boy and make me empty the vacuum after we were done.
She got out of prison last year and tried to crash at my place. Haven’t heard from her since.